Choosing

[tigriswolf]

 




I cannot forget the sight of you,

wings spread wide, so white and pure.

You soared across the sky,

racing the wind and bouncing on the clouds.

You were beautiful, so beautiful,

and I could not look away.

 

I still cannot,

even though you fly only in my memory.

 

We are all offered a choice.

Even you did not escape unscathed.

Forgive me for what I chose—

I don’t think I ever had another way.

 

 My wings are no longer as pure as yours.

I could not stand beside you.

Where you are as light as a feather,

I plummet as a stone.

 

I do not watch you race the wind anymore.

Do you still win?

 

My face is turned from the heavens,

away from the sun and hope and you.

My eyes cannot see so high;

it is all beyond me now.

 

This is what I chose.

I did not take a side—

Lukewarm. I was lukewarm.

And now my wings are blacker than soot. 

 

This is what I chose when I chose nothing. 

And I cannot look away even though I cannot see you anymore.

 

You race the wind in my memory.

 

Fare thee well, my love.

There is nowhere left to fall.