a dirge by candlelight - original poem, PG

[tigriswolf]

Title: a dirge by candlelight
Written: early March 2010

I burnt your letter today,
promises that won't come true,
lies about what me and you could've been.
Your son turned three a week ago
and you weren't here to know.
He asks about you sometimes,
about your height and your eyes.
I tell him you were six foot four
and always laughing.

I burnt your letter today,
while this little man you gave me played.
I know why you never came home,
but I still hurt and I still cry
whenever Janine complains about her Rob
or Maggie and Neal neck on our couch.
I've asked them not to do that but they forget;
It's been three years after all.
A lifetime for someone
who was barely a heartbeat when you left.

I burnt your letter today.
I miss you when it rains.
Our boy doesn't like avocados.
Mama says with time it gets easier
and Daddy tells me the new mechanic is a nice man.
Janine offers to set me up every day,
but I'm not ready.
I don't know if I'll ever be ready.

I burnt your letter today,
promises that won't come true,
lies about what me and you could have been.
Your son turned three a week ago
and I hope, wherever you are, that you know.
I hope he grows as tall as you—
I know he has your eyes.

I burnt your letter today.
I miss you when it rains.
I miss you when I'm cooking
and you don't offer to help.
You never could read a recipe or follow directions
but you always tried.
I loved you for that.
I love you for that.
Your son is my little helper;
he's always in the kitchen.
He helped me bake his cake.

I burnt your letter today.
Here, I scatter the ashes on your grave.
Let them find you, wherever you are.
I'm not ready to move on;
I don't know if I can forgive you,
but I'll try every day.
I'll try for our boy
and I'll tell him the truth one day.

I burnt your letter today.
It's been three years.
I hope you're happy.
I'll do my best.
I miss you when I dance with our son in the rain .

Comments

[melanth0.livejournal.com]

I particularly like the first and last stanzas. very pretty, very sad.

[tigriswolf]

Thank you!

[monicawoe.livejournal.com]

This is beautiful and incredibly sad. Awesome work!

[tigriswolf]

Thank you so much!

[tigremere.livejournal.com]

Original work -- Yeah! Give me more. That is a command-erhh- request. Please with puppy eyes looking at you?

Oh so sad this dirge.

[tigriswolf]

I have a Little Mermaid poem based on the original fairy tale, if that counts. It's not typed yet though.

Thank you so much!