life update

[tigriswolf]

So, someone left me a comment yesterday, which I read after a long, somewhat unpleasant day, while the end of the semester is looming and I'm burnt out, and I've got RL issues, and I've spent weeks researching what turns out to be a three page paper that's due next week, (three pages! I wrote that much for fun on Tuesday), and now I just don't feel like writing. I don't know if it's because of the comment, because I'm burnt out, or what.

But I was told to put the pen down yesterday, amongst other things, and maybe it's because I have a period-induced migraine, but I don't want to write at the moment. And I've been having fun all week writing about Peter Hale and Stiles Stilinski as serial killers (which Anon took offense to, apparently). And I write for myself, not other people, but it's nice to know that other people think I'm doing something right, and I don't understand why people feel compelled to say the things they say.

*sigh* I just feel like crap. I have three papers, a syntax project, and a syntax finale. I'm not sure if I have a full time job this summer or not, I'll be moving out of my parents' house, and I have to worry about other people doing stuff that I have no control over but will affect my life. This isn't the time to tell me i'm a terrible writer and someone has no idea why other people like what I write.

I don't give a fuck what Anon thinks, because Anon is Anon, and seriously, why would you read it three times to decide if it sucks or not? You know right away. But still.

I'm tired. I feel like crap. And I have to go work on my Beauty & the Beast paper. It's due a week from yesterday, 6-8 pages double-spaced. (Double-spaced. That's like 3 pages, which I wrote on Tuesday - 2000 words of Peter Hale, Stiles Stilinski, and Derek Hale getting revenge on the Argents. Which Anon didn't bother to read, because they just looked at the first chapter.) And a final reflection on what I learned in Politics of Literacy (I'm so glad I went to the school I went to, even with all its problems, of which there were many) which is half done, and a syntax paper and a syntax project and a final. And that's it. Two more weeks and my first semester at grad school is done.

I'm so tired.

Comments

[maldeluxx.livejournal.com]

*HUGS* :(

[tigriswolf]

*snuggles*

[caffienekitty]

Dude. You are awesome. Your writing is awesome (even though I rarely get the chance to read it because RL is sucking my life away), and will continue to be awesome. I think anyone who doesn't appreciate or understand your awesomeness is missing out and I am sad for them, but you don't need to take what they say to heart. It's their opinion, and their opinion can't make you any less awesome. Also, if they only bothered to read the first chapter, their opinion doesn't even have a real basis.

Getting comments like that is horrible, especially after a hard day/week/month and looking at the unopened comment as someone saying something nice that might pick you up, and then getting someone's uninformed negative opinion like that instead can be a real kick in the teeth. *hugs*

[tigriswolf]

It's a polarizing story, yeah, but still. I was raised with that whole, can't say something nice, don't say anything at all thing, so I don't understand internet trolls. *shrugs*

I feel much better now. Thank you!

[dreamlittleyo.livejournal.com]

This seriously makes me rage. It makes me want to shake the internet by the lapels and demand to know What The Fucking Fuck.

Even if you were a shitty writer that sort of comment would never be appropriate. It's clearly someone with a grudge (probably inspired by jealousy), deliberately trying to bring you down. But god, seriously, what the FUCK, you are an AMAZING writer. I am constantly amazed at the way you handle this huge, endless variety of characters without ever letting them seem flat or off. The number of fandoms you write in, and write in WELL, I just... I can't fathom having that kind of versatility. And for one stupid, spite-filled, hateful anon to come shit on all that (and fuck up your desire to write on top of it)... I don't have the words. Too busy raging.

I know it's tough to come back from a comment like that, hon. Even when you know they're dead wrong. (And I hope you DO know that. Seriously. Your work is INCREDIBLE and consistent and gorgeous and they are WRONG.) But I hope you're able to put it out of your head going forward and not let it stop you enjoying something that you love and that you are good at.

*hugs*

[tigriswolf]

Oh, wow, thank you so much. Usually, mean comments do roll right off my back, but sometimes it's a gut punch at a weak moment, you know?

Really, thank you. I just cuddled your comment like a thick blanket.

[dreamlittleyo.livejournal.com]

We can't be constantly on our guard against this stuff (never mind that we shouldn't HAVE to be) - even when we're at the top of our game, a comment like that is bound to throw us off. If it hits when you're already feeling down about things, there's just no rolling with it. Processing and rejecting and ultimately moving on though? Definitely doable - and I hope you've been able to get there since your initial post. *hugs* Don't let the anonymous assholes keep you down, hon, you are WAY too talented for that.

[bubblesbrnaid]

That person is obviously an idiot. Let us use the dirt icon in their honor. *selects* For starters, most reasonably intelligent people can tell if they like something or not on the first go-through.

Seriously, though, I *wish* I could write as well as you. Heck, I read stuff you write in fandoms I don't even *recognize*.

Of course, this being That Time Of Year In Academia doesn't help matters at all. I remember those days. Hang in there, hon.

[tigriswolf]

Thank you! I hope you check out the fandoms after reading; also, that icon made me *hee*

[kellifer-fic.livejournal.com]

*sighs*

Why do people feel compelled to not use the back button but instead complain at you about a story that they're not interested in when, y'know, they could just not read it.

I'm lucky in not having gotten many comments like that, and I can understand when someone thinks maybe a canon story is OC, but when you're writing an AU and someone disagrees with how you're portraying the characters, not in any real way but as a disagreement to a fundamental part of your story? Ugh.

Back button people. Do not engage. Use the power of free will, no one is making you read this story.

[tigriswolf]

I once had someone tell me that they couldn't believe I had Burt Hummel settling for Carol Hudson after being married to Loki. *shrugs* It annoyed them so much they refused to read the rest of the fic.

[kc-anathema.livejournal.com]

Anontrolls are total jackasses just looking to cause pain and misery because their own misery demands company. If they were good writers themselves, they'd use their names. If they weren't cowards, they'd use their names. And if they had any validity to go with their vitriol, they'd use their names. Don't let the bastards get you down. Find a way to relax, recharge and return to the fray, and plan a little of what you're gonna do to celebrate the semester ending. That's what your mind should be on--not this painful little imp whose world is so empty that s/he has to try to hurt you to give themselves some kind of substance.

[tigriswolf]

Ooh, celebrate the end of the semester? Start reading books for fun again! Never have to look at my syntax notes again!

I don't understand what pleasure anontrolls derive from their venom - it's not like they can see the reaction.

[kc-anathema.livejournal.com]

They hope that it'll net a response, the kind that will make them feel better about themselves, because they can't do anything with their own lacking abilities so they'll tear down someone else, and if they manage to do so, they'll feel like "hey, I could tear her apart, so clearly I must be better."